Gita for Life · Feelings
What does the Gita say about grief?
4 passages of the Gita on this question. Each shows what the verse says, why it belongs here, and Śrīla Prabhupāda’s explanation.
In short
The Bhagavad-gītā begins with a man sitting down in tears. Kṛṣṇa does not leave Arjuna in his sorrow: He heals it with knowledge of the eternal soul, with patience, and with the joy of devotion.
Let the tears come, then let Kṛṣṇa’s words come. Sorrow passes; the soul and Kṛṣṇa remain.
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Grief can overwhelm even the strongest
śoka-saṁvigna-mānasaḥ Bhagavad-gītā 1.46
What the verse says
After lamenting that they were about to commit a great sin 1.44, and saying he would rather be killed unarmed than fight 1.45, Arjuna put aside his bow and arrows and sat down on the chariot, “his mind overwhelmed with grief.”
Read 1.46 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
Sañjaya said: Arjuna, having thus spoken on the battlefield, cast aside his bow and arrows and sat down on the chariot, his mind overwhelmed with grief.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda says Arjuna was so afflicted with lamentation that he sat down again; yet such a kind and soft-hearted devotee is fit to receive self-knowledge.
“Such a kind and softhearted person, in the devotional service of the Lord, is fit to receive self-knowledge.”
Lesson
Grief does not mean you are weak or faithless. The greatest archer of his time sat down and could not go on. A heart that feels deeply is also ready to hear deeply.
Example
A father who always seemed strong breaks down when his business fails. Painful as it is, that moment can be the beginning of asking the real questions of life.
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Nothing in this world can dry these tears
yac chokam ucchoṣaṇam indriyāṇām Bhagavad-gītā 2.8
What the verse says
Arjuna says he can find no way to drive away the grief that is drying up his senses, not even by winning an unrivalled kingdom on earth or power like the demigods in heaven. Kṛṣṇa sees him with eyes brimming with tears 2.1, and Arjuna, surrendering as His disciple, asks Him for instruction 2.7.
Read 2.8 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
I can find no means to drive away this grief which is drying up my senses. I will not be able to destroy it even if I win an unrivalled kingdom on the earth with sovereignty like the demigods in heaven.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda points out that if wealth and comforts could remove lamentation, Arjuna would not have spoken like this. To end grief for good we must take shelter of Kṛṣṇa, as Arjuna was doing.
“Therefore, if we want to curb lamentation for good, then we have to take shelter of Kṛṣṇa, as Arjuna is seeking to do.”
Lesson
We often try to cover grief with distractions: shopping, screens, or simply staying busy. They may numb it for a while, but they cannot heal it. Healing begins when, like Arjuna, you ask Kṛṣṇa for help.
Example
After her engagement was broken off, a young woman tried to forget by watching series late into every night. Only when she began reading a little of the Gītā each morning did the heaviness slowly start to lift.
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The first medicine: see the soul, not only the body
gatāsūn agatāsūṁś ca Bhagavad-gītā 2.11
What the verse says
Kṛṣṇa’s very first teaching answers Arjuna’s grief: though he speaks learned words, he is mourning for what is not worthy of grief, for “those who are wise lament neither for the living nor the dead.”
Read 2.11 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
The Blessed Lord said: While speaking learned words, you are mourning for what is not worthy of grief. Those who are wise lament neither for the living nor the dead.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains that a truly learned person knows the difference between body and soul, and so does not lament for any condition of the body. The body is born and will end, today or tomorrow; the soul is what matters.
“The body is born and is destined to be vanquished today or tomorrow; therefore the body is not as important as the soul.”
Lesson
This is not an order to stop feeling. It is a new way of seeing: what changes and ends is the body, the situation, the role. The real person, the soul, is never lost.
Example
When the house you grew up in is sold, you feel sad. Yet the family that lived there is still your family. The walls were never the real home.
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No one we love ever stops existing
na tv evāhaṁ jātu nāsaṁ Bhagavad-gītā 2.12
What the verse says
Kṛṣṇa says there was never a time when He, Arjuna or all those kings did not exist, and none of them will ever cease to be. Closing this teaching, He says that the one who dwells in the body is eternal: “Therefore you need not grieve for any creature” 2.30.
Read 2.12 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
Never was there a time when I did not exist, nor you, nor all these kings; nor in the future shall any of us cease to be.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains that Kṛṣṇa, Arjuna and all the assembled kings are eternal individual persons, whose individuality existed in the past and will continue in the future.
“Their individuality existed in the past, and their individuality will continue in the future without interruption. Therefore, there is no cause for lamentation for anyone.”
Lesson
Every person you love is an eternal individual, known and cared for by Kṛṣṇa. Separation is real and it hurts, but it is not the end of who they are.
Example
When a close friend moves abroad, you miss her, but you never think she has stopped existing. The Gītā asks us to see every separation with that same understanding.
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Sorrow comes and goes, like the seasons
tāṁs titikṣasva bhārata Bhagavad-gītā 2.14
What the verse says
Happiness and distress appear and disappear like winter and summer. They arise from sense perception, and Kṛṣṇa asks us to “learn to tolerate them without being disturbed.”
Read 2.14 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
O son of Kuntī, the nonpermanent appearance of happiness and distress, and their disappearance in due course, are like the appearance and disappearance of winter and summer seasons. They arise from sense perception, O scion of Bharata, and one must learn to tolerate them without being disturbed.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda gives everyday examples: one who follows religious principles still bathes early in the cold month of Māgha, and a woman still cooks in the summer heat. Duty goes on through every season.
“One has to execute his duty in spite of climatic inconveniences.”
Lesson
You don’t have to feel better before you carry on. Keep up small duties (cooking, going to class, offering a prayer) and let the season of grief pass at its own pace.
Example
A month after his grandfather passed away, a boy still felt low, but he kept going to school and to the evening ārati. Slowly, without his noticing exactly when, the winter in his heart began to turn.
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Hold what you love as Kṛṣṇa’s
na śocati na kāṅkṣati Bhagavad-gītā 12.17
What the verse says
The devotee who is very dear to Kṛṣṇa neither grasps pleasure nor grief, neither laments nor desires, and renounces both auspicious and inauspicious things.
Read 12.17 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
One who neither grasps pleasure or grief, who neither laments nor desires, and who renounces both auspicious and inauspicious things, is very dear to Me.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains that a pure devotee is neither elated by material gain nor distressed by loss: even when he loses something very dear to him, he does not lament. He is ready to accept any risk for Kṛṣṇa’s satisfaction, and nothing can stop his devotional service.
“If he loses anything which is very dear to him, he does not lament.”
Lesson
This is a goal to grow towards, not a test to pass while you are hurting. Begin by seeing what you love as Kṛṣṇa’s gift placed in your care for a time.
Example
A pūjārī lovingly arranges flowers on the altar, knowing they belong to the Deity. When they wilt he is not shattered; he offers fresh ones. Our families, health and possessions are also Kṛṣṇa’s, given to us to look after.
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Joy returns in devotion
brahma-bhūtaḥ prasannātmā Bhagavad-gītā 18.54
What the verse says
One who is transcendentally situated at once realizes the Supreme Brahman. He “never laments nor desires to have anything,” is equal to every living being, and in that state attains pure devotional service to Kṛṣṇa.
Read 18.54 in Bhagavad-gītā As It Is
One who is thus transcendentally situated at once realizes the Supreme Brahman. He never laments nor desires to have anything; he is equally disposed to every living entity. In that state he attains pure devotional service unto Me.
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains that working for sense gratification brings misery, but in pure devotional service there is none: the devotee, whose mind is absorbed in Kṛṣṇa, is naturally always joyful and does not lament any material loss or gain.
“Because a pure devotee has no thought other than Kṛṣṇa, he is naturally always joyful.”
Lesson
Grief empties the heart; devotion fills it again. Chanting, hearing and serving Kṛṣṇa do not erase what you lost, but they give the heart a fullness that no loss can take away.
Example
After her husband passed away, a widow began helping to cook the temple’s Sunday feast. She still misses him, but her days have meaning and even joy again.
Two ways to carry sorrow
| Grief without knowledge | Grief healed by the Gītā | Verse |
|---|---|---|
| “I shouldn’t feel like this; I must be weak.” | “A soft heart is ready for wisdom.” | 1.46 |
| “I’ll keep busy so I don’t have to feel it.” | “I’ll take shelter of Kṛṣṇa and ask for guidance.” | 2.8 |
| “Everything I loved is gone.” | “The body and the situation change; the soul does not.” | 2.11 |
| “They have stopped existing.” | “They are eternal, and in Kṛṣṇa’s care.” | 2.12 |
| “This pain will never end.” | “Sorrow comes and goes like a season.” | 2.14 |
| “It was mine, and it was taken.” | “It was Kṛṣṇa’s, given to me for a while.” | 12.17 |
| “My heart is empty.” | “Devotion can fill it again.” | 18.54 |
Our reflections, each based on the verse named beside it.
Ask yourself
- Have I allowed myself to feel my grief honestly, or am I only covering it up?
- To whom can I turn, as Arjuna turned to Kṛṣṇa, to help me understand what has happened?
- Can I see the person or thing I lost as an eternal soul, or as Kṛṣṇa’s gift, and not only as something gone?
- What small duty can I keep doing today, even while my heart is heavy?
- What service to Kṛṣṇa could bring meaning back into my days?
The essence
Grief is where the Gītā begins, not where it ends. Let Kṛṣṇa’s knowledge comfort your heart, keep up your duties through the season of sorrow, and let devotion fill the empty place.
If sadness becomes too heavy, talk to someone you trust. In India you can call the free Tele-MANAS helpline, 14416.
The headings, explanations, lessons, examples, table and questions are ours, written to help you apply the verses. The Sanskrit lines, the verse translations and Śrīla Prabhupāda’s quoted words are from Bhagavad-gītā As It Is as published on vedabase.cc, unaltered.
All the verses for this topic
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Bhagavad-gītā 1.44–46
Alas, how strange it is that we are preparing to commit greatly sinful acts, driven by the desire to enjoy royal happiness.
Show the other 2 verses of 1.44–46
I would consider it better for the sons of Dhṛtarāṣṭra to kill me unarmed and unresisting, rather than fight with them.
Bhagavad-gītā 1.45 Sañjaya said: Arjuna, having thus spoken on the battlefield, cast aside his bow and arrows and sat down on the chariot, his mind overwhelmed with grief.
Bhagavad-gītā 1.46 Why this verse is here
Arjuna, being griefsriken, decides not to fight.
From the study outline of the chapter
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
From the purport to 1.44
Driven by selfish motives, one may be inclined to such sinful acts as the killing of one's own brother, father, or mother. There are many such instances in the history of the world. But Arjuna, being a saintly devotee of the Lord, is always conscious of moral principles and therefore takes care to avoid such activities.
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Bhagavad-gītā 2.11–13
The Blessed Lord said: While speaking learned words, you are mourning for what is not worthy of grief. Those who are wise lament neither for the living nor the dead.
Show the other 2 verses of 2.11–13
Never was there a time when I did not exist, nor you, nor all these kings; nor in the future shall any of us cease to be.
Bhagavad-gītā 2.12 As the embodied soul continually passes, in this body, from boyhood to youth to old age, the soul similarly passes into another body at death. The self-realized soul is not bewildered by such a change.
Bhagavad-gītā 2.13 Why this verse is here
Don’t lament unnecessarily, all individuals exist eternally and changing bodies is natural.
From the study outline of the chapter
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
From the purport to 2.11
The Lord at once took the position of the teacher and chastised the student, calling him, indirectly, a fool. The Lord said, you are talking like a learned man, but you do not know that one who is learned—one who knows what is body and what is soul—does not lament for any stage of the body, neither in the living nor in the dead condition. As it will be explained in later chapters, it will be clear that knowledge means to know matter and spirit and the controller of both. Arjuna argued that religious principles should be given more importance than politics or sociology, but he did not know that knowledge of matter, soul and the Supreme is even more important than religious formularies. And, because he was lacking in that knowledge, he should not have posed himself as a very learned man. …
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Bhagavad-gītā 2.26–30
If, however, you think that the soul is perpetually born and always dies, still you have no reason to lament, O mighty-armed.
Show the other 4 verses of 2.26–30
For one who has taken his birth, death is certain; and for one who is dead, birth is certain. Therefore, in the unavoidable discharge of your duty, you should not lament.
Bhagavad-gītā 2.27 All created beings are unmanifest in their beginning, manifest in their interim state, and unmanifest again when they are annihilated. So what need is there for lamentation?
Bhagavad-gītā 2.28 Some look on the soul as amazing, some describe him as amazing, and some hear of him as amazing, while others, even after hearing about him, cannot understand him at all.
Bhagavad-gītā 2.29 O descendant of Bharata, he who dwells in the body is eternal and can never be slain. Therefore you need not grieve for any creature.
Bhagavad-gītā 2.30 Why this verse is here
Birth and death are inevitable. No need to lament for the eternal soul.
From the study outline of the chapter
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
From the purport to 2.26
Even if Arjuna did not believe in the existence of the soul—as in the Vaibhāṣika philosophy—there would still have been no cause for lamentation. No one laments the loss of a certain bulk of chemicals and stops discharging his prescribed duty. On the other hand, in modern science and scientific warfare, so many tons of chemicals are wasted for achieving victory over the enemy. According to the Vaibhāṣika philosophy, the so-called soul or ātmā vanishes along with the deterioration of the body. So, in any case, whether Arjuna accepted the Vedic conclusion that there is an atomic soul, or whether he did not believe in the existence of the soul, he had no reason to lament. According to this theory, since there are so many living entities generating out of matter every moment, and so many of them are being vanquished every moment, there is no need to grieve for such an incidence. …
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Bhagavad-gītā 2.27
For one who has taken his birth, death is certain; and for one who is dead, birth is certain. Therefore, in the unavoidable discharge of your duty, you should not lament.
Why this verse is here
One who takes birth is sure to die (2.27 jātasya hi dhruvo mṛtyur...)
From the thematic compilation Death
Śrīla Prabhupāda explains
From the purport to 2.27
The Battle of Kurukṣetra, being the will of the Supreme, was an inevitable event, and to fight for the right cause is the duty of a kṣatriya. Why should he be afraid of or aggrieved at the death of his relatives since he was discharging his proper duty? He did not deserve to break the law, thereby becoming subjected to the reactions of sinful acts, of which he was so afraid. By avoiding the discharge of his proper duty, he would not be able to stop the death of his relatives, and he would be degraded due to his selection of the wrong path of action.
Everyday questions answered by these verses
Related topics
Each verse is linked to this topic by a statement in our primary study source, shown under “Why this verse is here”. The verses and Śrīla Prabhupāda’s words are quoted from Bhagavad-gītā As It Is, unaltered.